Wats Up
Angkor Wat is many things. It’s an iconic UNESCO World Heritage site, driving Cambodia’s tourist industry. It’s the largest religious structure in the world. It’s a 12th century Hindu temple dedicated to Vishnu. It’s the mausoleum built by the Khmer king Suryavarman II to house his remains, repurposed as a Buddhist temple only 27 years after his death. It’s the center of a much larger complex of temples throughout the area. And for the purposes of this expedition, it is also an astronomical and cosmological clock.
The most spectacular effect of the design is the sun rising directly over the central tower on the equinoxes, but that’s only the most visible part. Allow me to lean on Wikipedia:
The 91 asuras in the south represent the 91 days from equinox to winter solstice, and the 88 northern devas represent the 88 days from equinox to summer solstice. In fact, there are either 88 or 89 devas in the scene, 89 if the deva atop Mount Mandara is counted with the others. There are 88 or 89 days from the spring equinox, counted from the first day of the new year to the summer solstice.
That’s a lot of action, but there’s tons more. Adding the heights of the two sides of the central tower gets you 365 in the Cambodian measurement unit, the hat. The moat’s measurements correspond to the number of thousands of years in each of the four time periods in Khmer cosmology. The distance between steps in the central sanctuary is 12 hat, matching the number of lunar cycles in a year. And that’s just scratching the surface. It’s a long list, making Angkor Wat one of the most sophisticated representations of time in the ancient world.
Entirely by accident, we’re in Siem Reap during the spring equinox. All enjoying it required was being up and ready to go for our 5:00 AM tuktuk to Angkor Wat. Reporting for duty!
The Angkor National Museum
Our first stop was actually the day before our Angkor Wat visit. It seemed like a good idea to get a little grounding in what we were about to see before we careened about the temple, so we paid a visit to the Angkor National Museum, a five-minute tuktuk ride from our apartment.
The museum wasn’t actually all that large. The vast majority of the artifacts from Angkor Wat are still in Angkor Wat, which is for the best. But there were some choice pieces, and a fair amount of context to help us understand what we’d see the next day at the temple itself. It was a very digestibly sized series of exhibits, which was nice, given that Dorothy’s recovery from her fall was still an ongoing process.
The first gallery, after a brief video introduction, was the 1,000 Buddha Gallery, named after a similar gallery at Angkor Wat. We didn’t count, but I’ll take their word for it. There were a lot of fucking Buddhas.
We both thought that the highlight of the museum was the collection of intricately carved lintel pieces that had come from Angkor Wat.
How can you not love this adorable little fella? Like a Dark Muppet. 
The Cambodian Garudas seem friendlier than the Thai versions we’re familiar with. I’d have a drink with this guy. 
There’s a lot going on here… 
But the fine grained detail is impressive. 
Ridiculously graceful and elegant. I wanted it, but Dorothy said we didn’t have room. That is so like her.
My personal favorite was the respect shown to a prosperous physique. There was a time when my profile was hot. Sadly, that time was centuries ago.
There was also a nice scale model of Angkor Wat. We felt fully equipped and ready to hit the temple at dark o’clock the next morning.
Angkor Wat At Dawn
We got up at 4:00 AM to be ready for our tuktuk pickup at 5:00.
Our driver knew a back entrance that was used for the handicapped, as it allowed the tuktuks to get much closer to the temple complex. Dorothy’s cane, to say nothing of her obvious limp, qualified us. Like White Privilege. Score!
We got there at 5:20, with sunrise scheduled for about 6:10. Of course, that’s when the sun rose above the horizon. It would take another full hour before it crested the central pagoda.
And the payoff…
The sharp-eyed amongst you will notice that the sun doesn’t appear to be rising directly over the central pagoda. This is how I discovered that I had Location Services turned off on my phone’s browser. When I asked the date of the Equinox, it gave me the answer for Chicago. Because of the time difference, the same celestial event occurred in Cambodia… the next day. We were there the day before the Equinox.
Which is fine. We may have missed the crushing crowd of hippies and the crystal energy hoo-hah of the actual Equinox, and a fraction of the raw, reckless beauty of the sun rising over the central pagoda. But there are sunrise tours of Angkor Wat every day of the year for a reason. It’s an amazing experience, and while we (I) may have felt a little foolish, we didn’t feel shortchanged in the slightest. We still witnessed sunrise at Angkor Wat.
The Temple
Angkor Wat is considered the Eighth Wonder of the Ancient World. Of the original seven, the Pyramid at Giza is the only other Wonder still standing, although we did visit the ruins of the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus, so that kind of counts. If Egypt is ever OK to visit, maybe we’ll complete our Wonders of the Ancient World bingo card.
There was an upper story, accessible by steep stairs, with what is reputed to be an awesome view. I’ll never know.
Having been rescued from the tops of pyramids twice in Mexico, I uncharacteristically chose not to ascend. See? I can larn things.
While the structure of the central temple with its three pagodas is rightfully the site’s showstopper, the whole place is rich in details that reward close inspection.
The Apsaras
The Apsaras are the celestial dancers that are pavéd all about the temples. If you didn’t know any history and just walked through Angkor Wat and you were asked at the end, “What was that all about?” you’d answer “Tits.” And that’s not just me. Dorothy also saw it as a temple to breasts. Fine. There are way worse things to worship. Looking at you, Ba’al.
The Apsaras are also the inspiration for the traditional Cambodian Apsara dances, which were actually created in modern times using the Angkor Wat carvings as source material. We went to an Apsara dance performance the week before visiting Angkor Wat, which turned out to be super helpful, as we had a context for what we saw throughout the temple.
Here’s one of the clearest examples, as it relates to the dances. You can see all of the hallmarks: the flexed toes, the fingers curved back, the careful balance, and even the costume. These are all elements that were picked up from the carvings to create the dances.
This etching also tells the story of how Angkor Wat wasn’t finished when King Suryavarman II died. The above is from a gallery all of whose etchings were sketched in and never finished. Here’s another interesting unfinished piece. The medallions on the right have been completed, with the ones on the left just roughed in. In the top row, second from left, you can see the beginnings of the whorled pattern from the completed medallions.
Here are more of the etched Apsaras.
In addition to the etchings, completed and otherwise, the Apsaras are most prominently represented by bas-relief carvings. They show off a riot of costumes, elaborate headdresses, and mid-dance poses.
This may be my favorite. It’s right by the entrance to the temple, down at an accessible height. Check out how polished the breasts are. Who knows how many centuries tourists have been copping a feel on their way in? 
Here’s another highlight. Notice the slender reed the dancer on the right is holding. And then recall that it was carved out of stone. Almost 900 years ago. 
One of the few anatomically correct Apsaras we saw. 
The breadth of the designs for the Carmen Miranda headdresses is amazing. 
More Rockettes. 
It feels like many of the Apsaras must have been modeled on specific dancers. The faces are anything but generic. These look like individuals. 
Apsaras are even carved into the lintels.
The Grounds
Beyond the temple itself, the site has extensive grounds and structures around its perimeter.
The view from the grounds. 
An expansive courtyard surrounds the temple. 
Looking back towards the West Gate from the temple. 
Angkor Wat is basically a square island surrounded by a rectilinear moat, which you can see here turning a corner. 
This is right at the entrance to the temples. The actual monkeys are macaques, so this should clearly have said “Beware of macaque attack.” I am devastated that it did not.
The Fucking French
A day trip isn’t complete without a shout out to the fucking French.
Angkor Wat has been in more or less continuous use since its 12th century construction. Successive waves of rulers and religious sects have all claimed the temple at one time or another, reusing it, repurposing it, and redecorating it. It’s been something of a palimpsest over the centuries, bending to the whim of whoever currently claimed control of it.
Well, that process looked entirely too naturelle for the French to tolerate, so they decided it should be stripped back to its “original” state. But who could possibly have the gravitas, the knowledge, the wisdom to make such nuanced distinctions? Mais bien sûr, les archéologues français. Who proceeded to remove everything that didn’t look “authentic” to their refined, French eyes, leaving the bowdlerized Angkor Wat we have today.
I know the French didn’t invent bloodless violence, but I think it’s fair to give them credit for perfecting it.
Dorothy, by the way, believes I should say something nice about the French, since I’m constantly berating them for being so very French. Fine.
Baked goods. The tasty residue of French fuckery is bread and pastries. I hope everyone feels better now that we’ve put a happy face on French colonialism.
Here’s Dorothy and our driver, Mister Lim, on our way back after a mostly successful adventure. Completely successful, if you overlook the whole Equinox thing.